When it comes to parenting, everyone seems to have advice to give out. Especially on how you should raise your kids. But not their’s so much… I want to pass on a nugget that has proven to be some of the best advice my wife, Tina, and I ever received.
Our kids were a little younger at the time, probably around 3, 5 and 7 years old. And like a lot of parents, we had at least one (all) of our kids who was pretty strong-willed. We were increasingly having to deal with actions and attitudes that required discipline, and some days it seemed like we were running our own little detention center.
Families can be tricky things and we live in a world and time where many are redefining what a family is. So who are we supposed to treat as “family” – or another way of asking this question is:
Who’s Your Daddy?
Imagine that you’ve been living in your house for a few years, going about your busy life: working, raising a family, going to school—all the normal stuff of life that keeps us focused on…well, ourselves. What would you do if all of a sudden you realized your own father, sister, or brother was alone–in terrible need–and had been living right next door?
Maybe they are, and you never noticed.
Who does the Bible say is in “our family”? If we consider ourselves Christians, is it just Christians, or if we are Jewish is it just other Jewish people? Can we get by with only treating people who are just like us and believe the exact same things we believe as family?
Or are we really called to treat everyone like they’re part of the family?
I guess the answer to the question of who you will treat like they’re your family is best answered by asking, would you treat Jesus like a member of your own family? Jesus told his closest friends a story one day to help them grasp the reality of how he sees everyone, and how he would hope we would see and treat others.
“When I was hungry you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, when I needed clothes you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, when I was in prison you came to visit me…. And his friends were like, “…We did…?”
He goes on and says, “I’m telling you the truth: Whenever you did one of these things for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, to someone overlooked or ignored, that was me–you did it to me.”
I see it like this: We have some brothers and sisters out there that are estranged from Dad, from God. They don’t trust him and stopped coming to holiday meals and family functions long ago. They are having a hard time believing that he really loves them. But he does, enough that he sent a Son–Jesus– our own brother, to rescue and save them. It cost him his life, but that’s how much he loves them and wants them restored to a full and wonderful life in his family.
So let’s stop worrying about who’s in or who’s out, saved or unsaved. Let’s treat everyone like family…the way God does.
Listen up fathers out there: if you have the privilege of raising daughters (or a daughter) then you are one lucky fella. Here’s why Daddies should date their daughters.
Life in a vibrant gospel-centered community –a missional community– is an amazing thing to experience. It’s something I believe we were all created to enjoy. But what does this really look like? How is it different than your current church or small group situation? Let me tell you a true story that will help illustrate the beauty of this.
A Broken Family
Good friends of mine, Greg and Mary, came to faith and become part of our community a few years back. They pretty immediately began to loop others into this life with us as they learned to live as full-time missionaries. One of the very first families that Greg and his wife Mary began to invite into their lives was a 16-year-old girl named Kirstan and her widowed mother, Julianna. They had a pretty rough story. (more…)
Many of us find our parenting style too often mirrors the ways we were raised by our own parents. And this is not always a good thing.
My wife, Tina, and I were raised in pretty similar ways. If we had to name the style of parenting our parents often used we would call it “transactional”. Every desire or action–even our emotions–was connected to a certain requirement or response based on the “value” of what it was we desired. Or avoided. (more…)
As a leader, your time spent developing and equipping the right people can have immediate and expansive results.
Leadership development is really just apprenticeship or discipleship further along the path of faith, knowledge, and skills. Discipleship further up the slope. If you have trained people in such a way that they can now reproduce and train others, in turn producing future leaders, you have the makings of a true movement.
